I initially clicked the “new post” button today because I was going to write about things I’m missing out on by not being in America (or ‘ Amrika’ as I’ve grown accustomed to saying). Today is a dear friend’s birthday but besides scattered Skype dates and Facebook posts, I haven’t seen her in two years and I miss her so much today especially knowing I’m missing out on her turning into a quarter of a century old. Most of my best college memories involve her and if I took the time, our list of inside jokes would make for quite a long tale.
But then came marriage (her’s not mine!), a child (again hers), moving away (this one is me) and I just miss her… a lot. I miss the parties we’d go to and the parties we’d throw. I miss our wardrobe and our colorful clothes/makeup. I miss the jokes. I miss our mutual obsessions. I just miss her. And I miss her son… who I STILL haven’t been able to meet. 😦
I’m also sad today because I received a wedding invitation (snail mail!) to another friend’s wedding and though I’ve missed several weddings in the last two years, it made me sad to sit here with the beeeeeautiful invitation in my hand knowing she sent it across the globe fully aware of how I won’t be able to attend. It’s a real bummer missing out on huge life events of people I care about.
So today, I got thinking…and… gosh… I miss America. I miss my friends, I’ve missed events and very special occasions, I miss a few cities, I had a moment a little while ago where I missed a few eateries I frequented a lot, I miss the freedom, I miss having my own place, I miss the options of entertainment, I miss the shopping, I miss all of it.
Which is odd to me because in the last two years, I’ve been very happy to be back home. I appreciate life here, I like who I am better, I’m so happy to have met my Man here, I have a great job, I like getting to know my family, I enjoy learning/re-learning things about Nepal… but the downside is having a completely different life that I no longer have access too.
While in the middle of work, I was thinking about all of these things and how I was aching for that different life… and I found this link about sex workers in Bangladesh and it served to put things in perspective. I guess most of my posts here end up being sad and contemplative and about things I think about (as the name of this stupid blog suggests) but I’m also very lucky that life likes to hand me little reminders of how truly lucky I am… at some point though I’m going to have to blog when I’m feeling quirky and hyper because they make for far more entertaining posts.
Happy Birthday SB!!!