i know you must look at me and think me mad. but in the very same way I am beginning to find less sense, lesser reason in the the world supposedly chosen for me. i am not the first to wander on this path and most certainly i will not be the last. if these words could be final i don’t know what wisdom I would impart. i don’t know of any wisdom I have acquired. all my attempts at a higher purpose were for naught. all my desires to not let the bitter take over were futile. all my quests for understanding led to the most complex of circles. once, i used to find these patterns beautiful. now, i find it to be made of only drama and hurt. these are not worthy of being carried on. we have made ourselves the best of fools to give meaning to things that matter not. forget fortune and fame, i don’t care for material gains nor of prestige sought. you will agree in my madness to see nothing of lives misplaced. when will your eyes adjust to the thought that individual journeys do not, cannot, should not, accumulate to things worthwhile. worth this existence. any claims you have of reasons to live, in time they too will leave you. misery and disappointment is certain, all else is not. and if you’re an eager fool, you too will look to where i am now. on a cliff. peace on the horizon. rest for a body that ages. pause for a mind that does not know how to stop. I don’t know what you seek in the ramblings of a half remaining mind. I don’t believe there is anything to be found save for nothingness. i have nothing for you, in the same way you have nothing for me, and the world left nothing for us. not even a thought of a perfect god. i know you must look at me and think me mad,but my insanity will lead me to my peace and that is all that I ask. I do not hope you will understand. i am sorry for what you think you have lost, please know there was nothing to be found. to nothing i am bound.