here’s a stupid little story, it’s 87% not worth reading.
I had a massive bowel movement. (you see how this story is starting…so if you keep reading, it’s not my fault). And I decided to tell my friend the entire story of it. what I had eaten for dinner (daal-bhaat. Oh man. So much of it. and a number of other things. ) And then what I ate this morning, my busy day, by late (and big) lunch (with dessert—I decided to skip the coffee), and my immediate need to defecate as soon as I arrived home.
When I was done, I felt lighter.
So I shared all of this (in even more detail) with my friend. And realized it was a bad story. So I made up a lie of sorts. I told him that I had considered blogging about it but figured it wasn’t the kind of crap (hah) people wanted to read…or was it? and that in sharing the story with him I was using him as a guinea pig, to gauge his reaction, and then to determine if this was blog-worthy.
He said my thoughts were interesting. I thought he was being polite. He explained it was sarcasm. I wondered how all of this would look in writing. Shit writing.
Then…. (you’re still with me?), we ended up having a fun conversation about farts. The different kinds…and the situations you find yourself when needing to deflate. The terrifically awkward ones. We laughed and shared stories, because who doesn’t have a funny fart story or two? And we giggled about it for a while. I know it’s silly, but that’s what I loved about it. it made me smile, it makes me smile still.
And it occurred to me we had this conversation because I decided to tell him about an awesome poop I had. Didn’t turn out so bad in the end. I can understand it may not hold the same appeal to everyone but I don’t see why we should be disgusted by it. it’s poop, not racism.
So I thought about those things. But then I wrote this anyways. Why? Meh. Why not. it’s my blog. My space. You’re here by choice. I know at least one person who (if he makes it this far in) will have winced at multiple points in reading this. he would have called me ‘crass’.
i don’t have a good ending.
(i also choose to believe that having actually (honestly) blogged about this, it mostly makes up for my lie. yes? good.)